A cure for the ‘loneliness crisis’
Mix and Mingle organiser Julian Bishop (left) and Cobb & Co Taupō owner Clinton Wells get ready to host the Valentines Day event. Photo: Dan Hutchinson
Singles aged 35 and over will gather at Cobb and Co on Valentine's Day for the latest installment of Taupō's Mix and Mingle.
By Dan Hutchinson
Organiser Julian Bishop could possibly be Taupō’s answer to Cupid but has his own pressures to deal with on the night – as facilitator for the event and as a single man looking for the right woman.
The Mix and Mingle events focus on face-to-face interaction rather than the swipe-based culture of dating apps.
Those who attend the events can join a private Facebook group of others who have had the courage to get out and mingle.
He says this approach addresses a growing “loneliness crisis” affecting many people in their 40s and 50s.
"People are really lonely out there and it's becoming really insular and a lot of men are wondering what their purpose is.
"It's about meeting people and having fun and building a connection base."
He wants people to find genuine connections beyond the limitations of online dating and it’s not just about finding a romantic match.
"If you get a spark, that's fantastic. But it's not necessarily what it's all about. It's about meeting people as well and having fun and building a connection base."
The Valentine's Day event comes at a particularly challenging time for singles.
A 2025 survey by Dating.com, although somewhat US-skewed, showed that Valentines Day was the second loneliest day of the year for single people, behind Halloween.
Julian says dating apps cater for the “super good-looking guys”.
"Unfortunately, if you are a 7 or an 8, you're out of the picture.”
However, face-to-face meetings allowed people to connect on more than just one level, but it was confronting for people to try, especially if they have been out of the dating scene for a while or are not naturally outgoing.
"It's just nerves, you know."
Each Mix and Mingle event costs $25, which includes the first drink.
An area of Cobb and Co will be set aside for the event and there is usually a good mix of men and women who attend.
People can bring a friend if they want and those who are not single are clearly labelled.
Each Mix and Mingle event costs $25, which includes the first drink. The event starts at 7pm and while walk-ups are allowed, Julian asks people to drop him an email at rsvp@mixandmingle.nz so he has an idea of how many are coming.
This weekend’s event is a ‘Lock & Key’ format designed to break the ice and encourage easy conversation, with women wearing padlocks and men receiving keys.
Participants mingle throughout the night and attempt to match the correct key to the correct lock, with spot prizes awarded for successful matches.
“It’s all about getting out, having a laugh, and making it easy to connect with others in a relaxed environment - especially on Valentine’s Day.”